Cat Slang: Windows

Window treatments, Screen guild, Hullabaloo jay -- hear what these mean to cats who bask in windows.


Indoor cats spend a lot of time sitting in windows. They don’t care if the windows are screened, glass, or if blinds are lowered or raised – they love to get in there and take in all the drama happening on “Cat TV.” This week’s cat slang lesson is about just that: windows. When my feline informant brought me this collection of top-secret cat slang, I asked if he’d like to spend some time in my living room window, through which mega sunlight was streaming. He told me he appreciated the offer, but was afraid other cats would see him and blow his cover. You see, “top-secret” means he’s not supposed to share these Fanglish terms with anyone outside the feline community. He feels guilty about bringing me these lists, but as soon as I hand over a bag of chicken treats, the guilt quickly fades. He just makes me promise to swear you all to secrecy. Understandable.

So are you ready for this week’s Fanglish? Of course you are. Let’s take a peek through the window of back-alley cat slang!

The act of cats birdwatching through a window.

While spending an entire afternoon window-shopping, Snowball spotted the cutest little red number.

Star of the screen
A cat who enjoys showing off to other cats by posing through a window screen.

Sir Applesauce and Waffles gathered on the patio because they knew Twinkle Toes would soon be star of the screen.

Nose job
Cats’ nose marks on a glass window.

After Hector finished watching squirrels, The Lady saw the nose job he left behind.

Window glazing

Applying a fresh layer of spit on a window by licking condensation.

Pancake enjoyed window glazing because he could have a drink and watch birds at the same time.

Hullabaloo jay

The excitement and drama of a blue jay crashing into a window.

The Man heard a loud thunk and saw Peaches and Patches go wild, so he knew there might be a hullabaloo jay happening.

Window pain
The frustration of seeing unreachable birds and rodents on the other side of a window.

A crowd of sparrows gathered at the feeder and Marshmallow felt window pain wash over him.

Blind siding
Accessing a windowsill from the side of the blinds because they aren’t raised.

Macaroni was used to blind siding when The Lady slept late on weekends.

Warmed loaf
A cat lying in a loaf position, in a window, absorbing sunlight.

The Man thought Smokey was alseep in his bedroom, but found the warmed loaf in another room.

Screen guild
Two or more cats who enjoy sitting together in a screened window.

Peanut watched a chipmunk in the backyard while he waited for the other screen guild members to arrive.

Window treatment
The act of one cat pushing another cat out of a prime spot in a window.

Cheesehead wanted the sunny bedroom window all to himself, so he gave Maxwell the window treatment.

Did you enjoy your Fanglish lesson? Good – I knew you would. Come back next week for a brand new list of terms And remember … mum’s the word!

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